By Lisa Cochrane
One of the biggest changes to my mom after she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s was that she lost all interest in the many activities that once defined her. Cooking, cleaning, gardening –activities she once loved, were no longer of interest. She also lost her once avid interest in reading the paper, watching the news, even reading a good book. She was only interested in things with a happy ending so children’s movies, plays and activities became our best option for entertainment and stimulation. Matinees were perfect as that was when she was at best and we could combine it with lunch.
During one visit, I took my mom to a production of a local children’s theater. We had a nice lunch and then took our seats for the performance. As soon as sat down, my mom told me she was cold… and I had not remembered to bring a sweater for her. Knowing that being cold would preclude her (and me) from enjoying the play, I decided to ask an usher for assistance. I soon returned to our seats carrying a bright red usher’s jacket for my mom to wear. My mom looked at it and laughed, but happily put it on and enjoyed the play.
We laughed about the Red Usher’s jacket all the way home and she remembered that afternoon for months. I teased her about the Bright Red Jacket long after either of remembered which play we saw.
By Lisa Cochrane
Living in CA, I made frequent visit to Chicago after my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. I would usually pre-plan an excursion or two during my week-long visits for two reasons: 1) To give my dad, her main care-giver, a much needed quiet day at home and (2) to add some stimulation to my mother’s life.
I often selected a matinee as my mother was at her best during the late morning and early afternoon and we could lunch, extending our outings (and my dad’s hiatus) for a good 5 – 6 hours.
As a visitor to the area, I often would select productions in an unfamiliar area of Chicago. I would print directions from Google Maps or MapQuest and then give them to my mother to read to me as we drove along. I could ask her to read the next direction to me, to help me look for the street for the next turn, or the number of the exit we needed. Giving her that little responsibility kept her mind occupied and made her feel more a part of our outing.
I also learned to frame each excursion as “An Adventure”. If we got lost, if mom got bored or it was taking too long to get there, or if I needed to change routes, all I would say is “it’s an adventure, Mom” and she (and I) would relax. Using “An Adventure” positioned the day differently… no matter what happened, it was all part of our “adventure”.
By Judy Starkweather
When my Mom moved to Atlanta, I needed to find a new doctor for her. I received a recommendation from someone at the Assisted Living Facility where she would be residing and made an appointment. After each visit, however, I had to make additional appointments with specialists, which meant carting my 91 year old Mom from one to another. It was tough since I was working full time. My mother wasn’t very helpful. She was always saying “Why are you taking me to another doctor? I’m sick of doctors!”
I learned that the Assisted Living Facility had a doctor who did “house calls” at the facility every Thursday. It sounded convenient, but the doctor always arrived at different times, so I seldom got a chance to connect with him and he eventually stopped coming to the facility all together.
I finally discovered that there were doctors called “geriatricians,” who deal exclusively with the elderly. When Mom had another fall, my sister and I went to work to find one. Unfortunately there aren’t too many of them out there and the one that was recommended to us wasn’t taking new patients. Could it possibly be this hard to find the right doctor?
I was getting desperate so I asked my personal physician and she recommended a very good one in the same office, who wasn’t a geriatrician, but who worked with many older people. After almost four years, we finally had our doctor!
This one truly understands the problems specific to the aging, and it’s made managing my Mom’s health care so much easier. She’s even trying to reduce the number of medications she takes, which is something my sister and I had been trying to do for years. She is also associated with the hospital nearest the Assisted Living Facility and will be able to guide her treatment the next time the inevitable occurs and she lands in the hospital. This is another important thing to consider.
The American Geriatrics Society has a Web site (http://www.americangeriatrics.org/) with a great deal of information about caring for your aging parents. If you go there, you’ll see that they are also concerned about the shortage of geriatricians in the country. Hopefully, as more of the population ages this specialty will become a more popular practice among doctors.
